Intertextual Connections


I told myself, "you need to go back in"

Once again, on a late afternoon over a weekend, I dozed off and woke up after a really hot nap. I would have to change the sheets. The humid weather in KL and ever surging rise in temperature is nearly as hot as our political friend's episode of late. I would not mention names, but I'm sure my friends from across the borders may identify. It's really hot, unbelievably hot (the weather I mean).

Just before the sun sets, calming the temperature, setting a soothing breezy landscape over the hills of Bangsar, I peered out the window to catch the crimson sky, a rare poignant moment for someone who is constantly reflective about what he does. I guess, he is going through some cloudy moments; trying to look for a silver lining.

My afternoon checklist was to head to the gym but because when you wake up at like 1pm, you gotta give. I stayed up till close to 7am this morning, I ended with a book and with me in bed, I suppose in that order, if my parents found me - they would be fine.

Anyway, I digress a little like most of our local newspapers today. I decided after my hot nap, I would take a swim and getting to the pool itself was a heavy order. I have just been so laidheavy. I jumped in and swam my heart out like a young boy, paddling every stroke and trying to break every mental barrier - I was basically trying to tire myself out. Push laps after laps in the dark pool with only beacon lights for guidance as if it was the lighthouse. How apt, to identify with the word of God. For me, I was just trying to swim from point to point coming out barely breathing and telling myself to keep going.

After a satisfactory push I got out of the pool and dry myself up whilst looking at the time, and it stopped for a moment. It was basically me and the pool and well, my imagination and the Big Man up there. I dropped everything walked around the sides of the pool and told myself, "you need to get back in!"

I grip my toes at the corners of the pool looking straight ahead thinking to self, "I need a second wind" Instead of taking that victorious Ian Thorpe jump splash, I sat down instead and kicked water with my feet while looking at them thinking over about my need of a second wind. I know it's not your fashionabl ending to a splash (haha) but to everyone's comfort I wasn't wearing speedos either.

I chewed on the second wind while the drops of water rolled off my skin with the reflection of light sending a presence with no one around to be there. It's at this point in time, I always feel whatever you need to do, do it for yourself.

And that was it, this time I went back in to swim like a young boy with fins. I may have looked stupid kicking and splashing all over but it was me. And it was worth it. It was fun. I really need to get back that drive and gear in me. I admit, that I haven't been at my best recently. Even my work has taken a slight dip, I haven't been most on top of things. I am not entirely too pleased with certain office handlings either, but that's people ultimately.

And you know what's the biggest irony out of this supposedly bravado post, the fact that I need to go back and take that plunge, it's not so that I become a man, but to jump back into my Heavenly Father's arms like a young child. Ouch. But a soft landing I'm sure.

It's been quite a workout physically. I think I'll go eat now. Tom Yam perhaps.

Oh, the biggest hurdle of this jump I realize its not anyone or anything, but yourself. Double ouch.

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